Mmmpreg, An Original Song
by Ihavefriends
Summary: Kurt and Blaine find out Kurt's pregnant and they tell Burt the best way they know how. Through song. Mpreg.


"It'll be fine, Kurt," Blaine assured, striding across the room to sit next to Kurt on the bed. "We're going to have this little, precious thing that we'll love so much. We'll take it to the park and show him off because he'll look just like you. You can even dress him like you." Kurt's face rose from his hands with a faint smile. It was his first since they found out they were going to be dads at eighteen. The smile was brief, for a mere moments later, a look of dread covered his face.

"How are we going to tell my dad? He's going to be so disappointed. He gave me that whole safe sex speech. You remember that, right? And here I am, pregnant." Kurt was speaking a mile a minute.

"Whoa, whoa," Blaine neighed. "You know we always figure something out."

Burt sighed contently, leaning back in his recliner. To him, nothing was better than relaxing on a Saturday afternoon watching Ohio State football pound the Big 10. He was just about to get up and grab a beer from the kitchen during a commercial break when Kurt, followed by Blaine, walked even more so delicately than usual down the stairs, carrying a boombox. Burt had seen the look Kurt's face sported more than once. He either wants something or he's guilty. Burt reached for his wallet.

"What is it for this time? You guys going on a hot date? With a boombox?" Burt chuckled, but his smile faded when Kurt raised his hands and motioned for him to stop. Burt tossed his wallet on the coffee table, leaned back and folding his hands in his lap. "What is it then?"

Burt watched as his son shared a brief glance with his boyfriend and nodded. Blaine's lips twitched into a small smile as he walked to the boombox and hit play.

Burt's brow furrowed as he tried to place the music. It sounded like something Kurt would've danced to as a small child. They probably have a video of it somewhere. Burt was jerked from his thoughts when Blaine started to sing.

_We've had so much relations like man and wife.  
I can't believe you never heard  
At first, there's pain, like you're shitting a knife.  
Then pleasure takes over and it's gone so fast  
And it's gone so fast, yeah_

Burt watched in confusion as Blaine sung odd lyrics to such a catchy beat. He could barely keep up with the words, distracted by Blaine's bizarre facial expressions and why was he dancing across the couch? He switched his focus, though, when Kurt began singing the next part.

_Oh  
So I can tell you we weren't aware  
We didn't know it was possible, we swear  
And in time, we'll no longer be a pair.  
Tell me will you even care  
Can you tell me if you will still care?  
Oh care_

Burt leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees, concentrating as they both began singing the chorus.

_Mmmpreg, ba duba dop  
Ba Kurt's preg, ba duba dop  
Ba we preg, ba duba dop  
Ba du  
Yeah_

The boys repeated that one more time, hoping to convey their secret to Burt through song. They even through in choreographed dance moves that pointed at Kurt during the "Kurt's preg" part and points directed at both of them during the "we preg" lines.

As the song faded out and Blaine stuck his hands on his hips, nodding and smiling to himself on a song well sung, Burt began to clap.

"Guys! That was great! The song sounded awfully familiar. Is that for Glee club?" Kurt stared dumbfounded at his dad while Blaine's smile faded. Maybe they hadn't done such a good job. "I know I'm usually such a hip and relatable dad, but what in God's name is a mmmpreg?"

Kurt's jaw sprung open. Was his dad always this dense? They had just sung a song to the tune of one of the best songs to come out of the 90s and Burt didn't catch any of it. He looked over to Blaine, who was leaning in to whisper in his ear.

"We could always sing it again," he shrugged. "I don't think I gave a hundred and ten percent on the first go and that's probably where we lost him. I had some pretty haphazard points. They were barely even directed at you!" Kurt gave him one of his "are you fucking kidding me?" looks and redirected his attention back to his father.

"Dad," Kurt began slowly. He sped up to spit this all out as soon as possible. "Blaine and I, well mostly me, are pregnant. We went to the doctor and it's completely possible and I'm sorry."

"Mpreg is slang for male pregnancy in the world on fan fiction," Blaine chimed in with a dashing smile.

Burt looked between the two of them, trying to find any reason to believe they were just pulling his leg. However, both boys wore a look of sincerity. Burt stood slowly and closed the distance between them.

"You're serious? I'm going to be a grandpa?" That got nods out of both of them. "That was the best song I've ever heard." Burt smiled wide as he pulled them into a hug.


End file.
